How do you start developing ADHD coping strategies?
Whether you have a diagnosis or whether you are at the stage where you are realising for yourself you may have ADHD, to begin with it can feel like a huge weight lifted. It can feel like things start to make sense and you suddenly realise that you have always seen things differently. It can make you feel optimistic, energised & validated. (Finally sweet sweet validation).
But what happens when the weight that is lifted comes crashing down at lightning speed?
It is really common for women with a late diagnosis to initially feel such relief that it can be really difficult when you actually have to start adjusting to your new diagnosis and getting on with life.
So how do you take your new information and make it work for you?
Start noticing situations/environments that leave you feeling stressed
As much as you cant always avoid stressful situations or environments (yes that meeting could have been an email) you can definitely start to notice the situations that leave you feeling overwhelmed. To start you off, take note of how you feel next time you don’t feel you are being actively listened to, or the next time you are in an under-stimulating environment.
Learn to say no
What is this mysterious word? Is this a real word? Show me supporting evidence. ADHD’ers can really struggle to say no. Which obviously can be a real issue when you suffer with literal chronic overwhelm. Saying no can be so hard that you often end up saying yes even though it really would have been better to say no. Impulsivity & execution function issues make this extremely difficult, however learning how to say no will benefit you both personally & professionally. Take some time to think about the areas of your life that you really value the most, then next time something is asked of you, take a pause and think, does this align with those things?
~ Please ~ get your 8 hours
It cannot be stressed enough how much quality sleep can really help your brain as someone with ADHD. However.. of course its not as simple as just getting into bed at 9pm, setting your alarm and then waking up at 7am and having the energy of a 7 year old for the rest of the day. Sleep can be difficult, which is why it is really important to establish some rituals that will aid your rest. This is different for everyone, this could mean showering at night instead of in the morning, getting into bed earlier or investing in a pillow spray, (personal favourite is the lights out hot shower before bed).
Clear communication
Shit can get messy. Like really e m o t i o n a l. Especially when there are other people involved. Making sure that you take the time (when you have the energy) to clearly communicate with those around you will really help you. Trying to communicate something that you have only just learnt yourself can be really tricky, try keeping notes before you jump into a conversation that may be potentially emotional so that you are able to communicate what you intended. Remember you don’t need to have it all worked out, but letting those around you know a few ways that they may be able to support you will make it all feel a bit lighter.
When are you most productive?
Whenever i type word ‘productivity’ i instantly feel myself becoming 45 year old john who works in finance writing a monthly newsletter about how we can all meet our targets. However what we are getting at here is… when do you most feel like getting things done? This might be creatively, strategically (yes strategically also applies to not mixing colours in wash loads). It might even be when you find yourself having the energy to go for a walk. By starting to hone in on when you feel you have more energy you can really start to prioritise the things that are going to help you that day.
And last but not least, remember you have time. Allow yourself this. You are processing a lot. You don’t have to do all of the things and you don’t have to feel happy all the time.
